Latin

genius

home again home again jiggety jig

Date: Wed, 8 Aug 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: home again home again jiggety jig

We did the census last night. If it had only been a little earlier I could have put down 'English teacher' and 'Beijing' for occupation and residence the week before. Then I would have felt cool and then when people read the censuses in 99 years time, they would have thought 'hey, she's cool.'

I have started life after China and feel (aside from a lingering feeling of "where are all the people/oh look at how clean it is/which way is the damn traffic coming from anyway/big brother is watching") largely unchanged.

I have started Uni and am studying a subject I love, with a lecturer I adore. He is the type of lecturer who makes me want to do my homework. And when he speaks Latin he sounds just delicious. Latin being the subject I am studying, hence 'delicious' not 'pretentious'.

I have found a new cafe to call my own. It’s quiet and the man who owns it bakes his own biscuits. It feels like you are sitting in his lounge room having a cuppa. Perfect place to sit in the window seat and study.

I am getting to know my new housemates. It is fun watching how everything is shifting around with my arrival. It is a share household, which will be a test for me, as I am not good at sharing.

Life is slower at the moment. I spend much of my time sitting in cafes around the university translating Latin into English. It is lovely to feel relaxed, the only demands on me being to saunter into class on time and wake at a reasonable hour.

love you
ceels

not for all the chickpeas in china

Date: Fri, 20 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: not for all the chickpeas in china

I hate packing. I seem to have six times as much stuff as I have room. You should see China Post people pack. They defy the universal laws. If I didn't have such big feet I could fit way more in my suitcase. It turns out that Chinese men don't like big feet, no matter how big your bottom is. Dammit. Now I am going to have to go back to being liked for who I am.

The other night there was a full moon and a clear sky and I saw the man in the moon for the first time. Until now I have only ever seen a rabbit sitting at a table. It was very exciting. (Yeah, I know).

So I am leaving Beijing.

I have changed a lot, you know. I can now dodge traffic with an ease that few who have seen me cross a road would believe. Because of the lack of full-length mirrors I now have a self-image that consists of two pairs of limbs and a face in the tiny bathroom mirror. I can project my voice over a room of forty yelling students. I can catch Beijing buses at peak hour. Food in all its guises does not faze me (except the stinky tofu). I can sing along to aqua, backstreet boys, n'sync, Christina and Britney. And I haven't watched television in six months.

And there are lots of things to miss. No more 35 degree heat and 75% humidity. No more waking up at 3am in a tangle of soggy sheets. No more men falling off their bicycles trying to get a better look at how white my legs are. No more catching a glimpse of my reflection on the train and realising that not only am I twice as big as everybody else, but also the neon light is making me glow like Christmas. No more walking into a shop and declaring that I have something, instead of saying that I want something. No more chewy-air days. No more cheap fresh lychees. No more watermelons that would make you cry for how sweet they are. No more being cheated because I am a foreigner. No more being stared (pointed/ laughed/ spat) at because I am a foreigner. No more squashing the mosquitoes on the wall by my bed (that really annoys mum). No more Chinese lessons from the guards at the gate. No more lots of things, but I can't think of any more.

It will be good to come home. I am going to eat pizza and steak and one of mum's hamburgers and I am going to spend all the money I have saved on clothing. All of it. I went to the bank yesterday to change my money. Unfortunately I didn't have the seven billion bits of paper and three eyewitnesses that Chinese bureaucracy needs to do any thing, so they wouldn't change my money. Another Australian teacher came in just after me. I tried bursting into tears and he tried raising his voice. We neither of us got what we wanted. I have to go back today with my plane tickets, contract, residence visa, passport, foreign expert papers and all my money (in cash, in brown paper envelopes). They are all in the one bag. I am experiencing hyperparanoia about someone stealing it.

Well, I must run, I am about to go head to head with my suit case to see if I can't convince it that it is bigger than it is.
all my love
china blossom

Olympic Games

Date: Sun, 15 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: Olympic Games


I have been having a good read of the age, and stuff about the Beijing bid. It is very interesting. One of the strongest arguments for giving Beijing the games was because it would mean there was greater focus on them and greater incentive for them to clean up their environmental and political act. And the last speaker for their bid actually played that card, with faintly ominous undertones of what might happen if Beijing didn't win.

One day at the start of the year all the grass was sprayed a foul green colour and I just found out that was for the IOC inspection. And they also shut down various factories to make the city seem less polluted. Just as well the inspection didn't come a month later, with all the dust. The dust was a nightmare. You would no sooner clean it up than it would appear again behind you.

In a lot of ways Beijing frightens me. Apparently there have been 1781 public executions in the last three months. All this stuff happens that is hugely inconvenient to people (like tearing down their place of residence or employment) and there is not much they can do unless the have connections in the party, in which case it wouldn't have happened in the first place.

None of it really affects me, and I suspect I know very little about it, it makes my head hurt trying to understand.

Another thing mentioned in the bid is how friendly Beijing people are. Which is and isn't true. To short term visitors 'hosts' will be excessively friendly. On the other hand people selling stuff will generally try to fleece you, unless you have been their customer for a long time (a month for dvd stores, four months for fruit and veg sellers) or have established your 'in-ness' (friend of a friend). People stare at you in the street with varying degrees of suspicion and dislike, a heavy weight to bear.

On Friday a taxi driver tried to fleece me by taking a circuitous route to my destination, making the taxi fare twice what it should be. I got really mad (I was having a bad day) and waved my hands and stuttered out a few phrases to the effect that I knew exactly what he had done and I’d be damned if I was going to pay the full amount. He seemed to find humour in the fact that I knew what was going on, and dropped the fare without argument. Perhaps encouraged by the fact that I had written down his cab number and the phone number for complaints.

Which is not to say that there are not just as many lovely people in Beijing as there are in Melbourne, but the (now rescinded?) government policy of overcharging (cheating) foreigners is a tenacious one, encouraged by three things. Everyone assumes that foreigners have plenty of money and so should pay more (maybe this is true?); the vendor gets extra money and is very unlikely to cop official reprimand; and a majority of foreigners aren't in Beijing long enough to realise how much extra they are paying. Paying 10 quai for a watermelon (roughly AU$2) isn’t that much, it’s just that everyone else is only paying 2 quai.

Beijing 2008

Date: Sun, 15 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: Beijing 2008

Well.
Beijing has the Olympics. The decision making process was broadcast live on about 16 of the 24 channels my television picks up.
I could make many cynical comments about Beijing’s presentation, but I am keeping a tight hold on them. It is very easy to be cynical in China.

The decision was announced at around 10:10pm and the entire city went bananas. Fireworks (illegal in china's big cities) were going off for the next three hours around the school. People were running through the streets. I went down to the gate to say congratulations to the guards, but my Chinese must be worse than I thought, because they thought I wanted to go out into the street and became quite distressed. It led to a waving of arms and 'you must not go out by your self'. It is nice to know they care about my well-being, but I did feel just a little like a big kid (which is what they call me, the other day one of them told me in tones of great appreciation 'you are so large and white and beautiful', mmmm.)

Yesterday and today the backslapping and self-congratulation were still going on. If I hear Beijing er-ling-ling-ba one more time I am going home.

Okay, I will just say two little things. One major point of the presentation was that they are nearly finished a three year tree planting project with something million trees put in. but I would like to point out that I have seen them planting the trees and in another three years they are all going to have to be chopped down because they will interfere with power lines, or buildings or roads or water/gas pipelines.
And the footage from the promotional video is all from the southern and eastern parts of Beijing (quite affluent) and must have been filmed last year, because we have only had one day that clear of air pollution since I’ve been here, and it was only a couple of weeks ago. So either they had a clear day last year too, or the whole thing was done on a computer.

hope everyone is well
love ceels

wanting

Date: Fri, 13 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: wanting

On the off chance I can get a flight out of China before Uni starts, and assuming I do decide to come home now, I don't suppose anyone knows of anyone in Melbourne who wants a housemate (me) for next semester?

unwanted

Date: Wed, 11 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: unwanted

Yesterday the newspaper made me redundant. The other part time guy just moved closer to the paper, so he can work full time now so my services are not required.

They made me redundant!! Apart from it being a crushing blow to my ego, they've known about this for weeks, so if they had just told me last week instead of last night, I wouldn't have re-signed my contract on Friday.

So now I am stuck in China for another six months.

you’re always tease tease tease

Date: Thu, 5 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: you’re always tease tease tease.

The weather is just superb. The air has been clear for two days, the humidity has dropped and the sky is just too blue for words.

They are moving right along with the construction. Today the trench in front of the supermarket had changed into a pit, guarded by a snarling toothful beast. The flames roared and little men with shining eyes brandished weapons of destruction. All looked grim in my quest for Snickers. I studied the situation. Sauntered past, attempting an air of disinterest. With swinging across out of the question and the bridge gone, the situation seemed bleak. Suddenly I noticed one of the beast's foul minions precariously balanced on a trail half a mile off. I ducked behind some passing natives and managed to gain the trail unobserved. Stones slid from beneath my sandals and my dry breath caught in my throat. With gazelle like agility I leapt to the other side as the path swept out from beneath my feet in a mini avalanche.
Quietly, calmly, casually I slipped behind the fierce warriors guarding the entrance to their lair, and into the underground cool of the supermarket.
And met with disappointment.
Alas.
Someone had beaten me to the snickers and there were none to be had.

Did you know that no one in Tibet has a surname? I have a Tibetan name now. The first part is the name of a Tibetan goddess and the second part is 'moon'. I feel like I don't really have my own name in China. I will answer to my name, my Chinese name, lao shi, teacher. One of the reporters at the paper has my name wrong and calls me 'xixi'. I get called 'Katrina' once or twice a week and I have even been called 'James'. (And here I thought only my mother called me that). In the street people expect me to answer to 'hello'. And I have learnt the negative word for 'foreigner' and the word for 'big nose' through repetition. No one here calls me ceels. Apart from anything else it is too hard to say.

with all my love
who ever I am

a wilting china rose

Date: Sun, 1 Jul 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: a wilting china rose

'Just answer your damn phone mister, before I do something irreversible with it.'

Stupid phones.

'Scuse me. The man over there won't answer his phone. It has the most irritating ring tone.

Living in Beijing is very interesting. You are as likely to be run down in the street by a front-end loader as a bus (they move at about the same speed) and even going to the supermarket has become an adventure. There is a saying in Beijing about their roads being like zippers. Apparently this time they have opened up the road to put in a new subway line, but it looks suspiciously to me like they are just digging big holes and filling them in again. There is a deep trench in front of the supermarket that you cross by means of three muddy planks tacked together. They bounce. And I am much larger than your average Beijinger. I have a good imagination.

Actually my imagination is getting out of hand lately. I keep thinking of doing things and imagine so strongly that I have done them, that I don't. And then the other night when I was having dinner with Aiyi (one of the reporters at the paper) I made a remark about wanting to learn Chinese better and he said something along the lines of 'well, when you have been living and working here for four or five years...' and suddenly I had a very clear vision of myself married to Aiyi, with six or seven Chinese babies. (Well, one Chinese baby of course, but while the Chinese government can stop up a girl's loins, they can do nothing about her imagination)

Maybe it IS time to come home.

I saw some foreigners near the school today, but they were Russian, so I couldn't talk to them. I can spot a foreigner a mile off. It is even getting so that I can pick people who are not from Beijing, sometimes.

I have seventeen mosquito bites

Date: Wed, 27 Jun 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: I have seventeen mosquito bites

I’ve read a lot about having your pockets picked, every one from Prince Kheldar to Sherlock Holmes. But now I feel I have the authority to write about it.

Didn’t feel or see a thing.

I have heard that members of the 'Jedifaith' want to have the 'Jedi Faith' listed as an official religion on the national census. I think I might have to come home, as Australia seems to be falling apart.

Yesterday on my way to work at the newspaper I saw a couple of dozen police hats neatly lined up in a grid pattern on the foot path. Because nothing in China surprises me anymore, I was not surprised. And when I got around the corner I discovered that a couple of dozen policemen were being made to run around the block in forty degree heat with no hats.

When I left the paper I ran into a bunch of army guys marching in time and I felt a little intimidated. Then I noticed that, just like in my classes, the ones up the back were stuffing around and generally behaving like fools, knocking each other’s hats off and tripping each other up, and I felt reassured.

Ceels

Date: Mon, 25 Jun 2001
From: Ceels

Also, on Friday I ate clotted pig's blood. It is supposed to clean out your lungs, and at this stage, I’d give anything a go.

On Wednesday I learnt a valuable lesson about squat toilets and leaving your keys in you pocket.

Date: Mon, 25 Jun 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: On Wednesday I learnt a valuable lesson about squat toilets and leaving your keys in you pocket.

Beijing is a very interesting place to live. It is full of noise and people and music and construction. The other night someone was playing the violin down on the driveway and I went down to investigate and ended up singing a rousing Chinese/English duet of 'Click Go the Shears'. And the immersion technique of learning language is very interesting. As each new fruit comes into season I learn its name and last week when the mosquitoes started biting me I learnt 'wen zi' the Chinese word for mosquito (and entirely more appropriate). And yesterday I learnt the Chinese words for 'your wallet', 'stole' and 'little boy'.

By the way, the lambs are still alive (by what miracle I do not know)

sunburn and speed wobbles

Date: Mon, 18 Jun 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: sunburn and speed wobbles

Yesterday, when I was sitting on the Great Wall watching a thunderstorm come over the mountains from Mongolia, I was thinking that...

Actually I don't know what I was thinking, I just wanted to start my email that way because yesterday I was sitting on the great wall and I was watching a thunderstorm. But I wasn't thinking much. I was exhausted from having climbed so far. I actually made it to the end of the section we were on (si ma tai). When I was nearly there I sat down on a rock and was really comfy and thought 'ehh, I’ll just wait here for the others to come back’. But then I figured I’d got that far, a little further probably wouldn't kill me.

And it didn't. And I met a man from London who was in Port Fairy when I was in Dorset and there was a stunning view and it was all good and I was happy. Then on the way home on the bus with the super-cold air conditioner my cold got worse. Then when I got home I was all misery-guts and hopeless. And now today I am really sick and I’ve got the speed wobbles and I want to go home.

So, reasons to stay in Beijing: good job(s) (most of the time).

I am just starting to get the hang of the language.

With fewer hours working, I might make some friends.

The kids are really cool.

And to return: I might shake this cold I’ve had for four months now, it's back for the seventh round.

I can do fun uni stuff.

Less smog.

I’ll be home before they decide about the Olympics.

In the balance it seems I should stay here. Mum thinks I am just being stubborn about staying. She has been known to be right about me before.

The school is foolish. They should have made me sign the second contract when I changed my mind the first time.

Thank you for all the lamb-milk recipes.

love you
ceels

happy as a pig in mud (more apt than you might expect)

Date: Fri, 15 Jun 2001
From: Ceels
Subject: happy as a pig in mud (more apt than you might expect)


Today in a serious error of judgement I became a mother, a saviour and a science project.

I was teaching junior one (year seven) class 2 when one of the little girls came up to me and asked me if I knew how to feed sheep
'I guess so,' I replied carefully (as you would)
'Do you know how to feed baby sheep?'
'Ye-es' (I did grow up on a hobby farm)
'That’s wonderful'
'Ah.... why?'.

It turns out that on the very top floor of the school they have a little room and in the little room are two nearly dead lambs. They have been there for three days and the children have been feeding them lettuce leaves. I tried to tell them that they need to be fed milk and was met with 'but where would we find that, that is not a good idea.' so I made up some runny porridge and they picked at it, but really weren't interested. And now I am stuck. What do you feed lambs if you don't have sheep’s milk and you are living in china and wouldn't have the first clue where to find formula.

Not only that but because it has rained for the last two days it is now quite cold. Which I like but it is not so good for lambs living in a concrete room with only a sheet of newspaper to sleep-on. Which they have been trying to eat.

There have been three thunderstorms in a row. Every time lightning struck last night I woke up with a faint buzzing feeling and all my hair standing on end. Very strange feeling. The rain has been simply bucketing down. The streets are awash with mud and 'other', and all the plants are clean.

Last week I went with the American (Ginny) who is staying in the school and her Chinese friends to the western hills. We climbed Xiang Shen in 37degree heat and then had lunch in a temple with no Buddha. I didn't take to Ginny immediately. Probably because her first reaction to me was one of pity. Apparently I am young and I should be going out and making friends. I felt like telling her that I am practicing for when I am an eccentric old biddy living in the mountains with my ducks and horses. Anyway, I quite like her now and have forgiven her magnanimously.

I guess you can't get a group of friendly Canadians every time.

Oh, and here's something to give you a bit of a laugh. My job at the newspaper? I am proof reading the finance and business pages. You could start quite a successful company on what I don't know about finance and business. So between my lack of knowledge of how that sort of article should read and the Chinese propensity for making everything sound like a murder mystery novel, I am not cutting a very impressive figure, but they have not fired me yet, so...

I have just realised that I haven't eaten. I forgot to eat breakfast and spent all lunchtime trying to feed baby lambs. And, as today is my day from hell (back to back classes from 8am to 3.15), I haven't had any other time.

I go to satisfy my hunter gather urges